And Here I Go Again...

Yeah, if you read the last post... when I said that I had an odd feeling to write something about death... well here it is. I'm going to open up the can-o'-beans that is my head. Lucky, lucky you. Lucky, lucky, lucky, lucky, clucky, clucky, cluck, cluck... er... sorry, I just remembered that scene from Blackadder III.

Anyways. Where to start...

Well, I remember I said something about it before, though it was mostly about religion, not death itself...

Well (again), I'm seventeen, going on eighteen (...shit)... and as I approach this milestone, I'm genuinely scared of what the future has in store with me. Not only that, as I'm sitting here, typing these words that will last much longer than I will (unless BlogSpot goes under administration), I realise, maybe more than others my age, of my mortality. The fact that I, one Gareth Aled John, will die. Even as I wrote that sencetence (and as I misspelled that word again), I don't want to accept it.

I mean, other's my age are care free, probably the only bad thing they think of is if they fail they're exams or if they won't get into university (yeah, both linked to me). With me, it's the little known fact that I will cease to exist in a matter of years, weeks, or even maybe seconds. Like, it's a guess, but when you were young (say, five, six, roughtly that age), you were playing around, saying stuff like 'I wanna live forever woooo' or something like that. Me? All I remember going was 'I don't want to die!'. Me, aged six, crying into my sister's arms, repeating the same five words over and over again. All that was about was the BBC News said the Solar System would end in a small hiccup, rather than it's big bang entry.

It's the same now. I was in bed, roughly twelve-ish. I was just lying there. It hit me that I wouldn't be here forever. I just panicked. Jumping out of bed, saying 'No. NO!'. And for some reason, I broke down slightly, shedding a few tears (which, I know, sounds pathetic). I tried to return to sleep, but everytime I closed my eyes for a few mere seconds made me fall I was getting closer to my final destination. So, I ended up watching the whole first series of Little Britain. Though, my tiredness had overridden my thaughts, thus making me sleep through Jeremy Kyle and my tea froze. Also it made my next three nights be a short sleep.

I know why I'm like this. Well, I think I know... it's like when I typed 'I, Gareth Aled John, will die', I just felt like I was a number. Nobody'll take notice at the fact that I would've met my maker (as a guess, I think it's Aldi). Or if people do notice, there'd be a few tears shed for the sake of the occasion. But there's nothing that'll put me in the future's mindset.

If that doesn't make sense, I'll try to make sense of it. It's like, look at everything around you. Your computer screen. Your top, socks, trousers. Your walls, your ceiling, your floor. Anything. Everything you've looked at. All that will last longer than you will. It's true. Well, most of it. I mean that cup of tea that I wasted didn't last longer than me, it went down the toilet, but the cup might. Anyways, that cupboard that's holding most of your belongings will be there, and maybe in some fifty years, there'd be a futuristic Antiques Roadshow, and that dude'll tell the antiques dealer 'oh, not sure who was the first owner is'. See? You'll be 'the first owner'. Some guy (or girl). A pile of skin and bones, wasting away whilst the memory of you disappeared by the time your grandchildren become grandparents. Then all you'd be is someone's great-great-great-great grandad. No-one'll remember your name. And I don't know about you, but I don't want that to happen. It might sound that I'm turning into some egotistical person, but I don't want to end up dead, with nothing to show for it.

Saying that, in my head it'l like a double edged sword. I want to be remembered in years after the inevitable (spelling?), but I don't want to become famous for it. I don't want to be in the mainstream, where everything I do, everyway I turn, is in the eyes of Big Brother and his ten cats. But, as I feel the reality of is seems to show me so harshly, it seems that the only way to even think of having a memory after death is to become famous. Take Marily Monroe. Would she have a long lasting memory if she didn't do the things she done? I don't know what exactly, I think she was an actress. But the mere fact that I know what she looks like, though I've never met her... it must show something about her impact of the world (well, not impact, y'know what I mean)...

Wuthering Heights is on ITV1 at the moment. Cathy's just died. Heathcliff found out and basically broke down. At least that's what I think's going on. Just to let you know.

Anyways. Since I won't be around when I die, I don't really know why I want to be remembered so badly when I go. Maybe I want to feel like I've done something worth remembering. And what have I done so far? Created a blog with thrity-six posts and participated in three cricket matches, in which I managed only five runs while batting, and three wickets while bowling. Oh, don't forget the whole 'took art for AS level and got kicked out of it when there was a week left until the coursework was supposed to be in by' thing. Oh, it must've been hilairious for some people when I finally got the shove. Ah well, who gives a shit.

Ah well... I should leave it there before I go nuts... but before I go... I have one question... what would Jesus do?...



Sorry, I love Outnumbered... =).

- Fin.

An Ode To No-One.

For some reason, I've gotten really into lyrics, of other people's creation. My post title, I believe, is a song by the Smashing Pumpkins, on the 'Infinite Sadness' album (the same album as 'Bullet With Butterfly Wings'). So yeah, that's the blog title today.

I was going to write something about death, 'cause for some reason it's been on my mind since about a week ago, but since it's going on for ten, I don't want to start typing about it (well, I was going to say talk about it, but you can't hear my voice... at least that's a plus side for all you readers...), because if I do, it'll be on my mind all night and I won't be able to sleep for ages. Y'know, my brain's a bastard like that... Anyways.

This has turned into a picture post now. I would've said 'picture perfect post', but what is perfection?... shite, does anyone really care?

By the by, I shall carry on. I've done two desktop backgrounds (or wallpapers, for you hip old-schoolers who play solitair on their Windows 98's). So, here's the first...



One thing, don't ask me who the girl is in the background, I can't remember myself. Just found the image on a site and thought about editing it, and finally did when doing this image. This is maybe the most 'blue' image I've done. Y'like? =).

Next.



Yeah, such a happy thing. I only did this in like, an hour or so. And it shows. Anyways, if you're interested in how I did it (and, I'm just guessing, you aren't), it's basically feckloads of overlayed wall and paper textures. Used some brushes for added grunginess. That's what I do on PhotoShop. Grunge. 'Tis my speciality. Well, it isn't really grunge... just an attempt on it. No idea why I put 'Welcome to hell' on it though, I just thought about it while looking on Abduzeedo, for a lark.

Oh yeah, if you want the full size one, click on the image. It'll take you to my Flickr account. There's only three images on it so far (these two and one of Hayley Williams). Should use it more. I also have DeviantART, but a link to that is on the side where a linke to my RedBubble, MySpace and all that shizz is. So yeah, feel free to critique me. Would be nice, like.

Oh yeah, to dive into infinite sadness further (what a link to the title of the post, hehe), I've got the Ashes Cricket 2009 game. Woooo. I'm pretty shit at it, only managing 100-odd runs on the first go, and losing to Bangladesh (yeah, I was Australia for that go... man, I'm crap). So yeah, must work on that game...

Talking about games... there's a news piece on Ultimate Guitar...

'Kurt Cobain: Your Newest Guitar Hero Character'.

So yeah, Cobain's the second dead person to appear on Guitar Hero, alongside Johnny Cash in Guitar Hero 5 (Jimi Hendrix was the first one, on Guitar Hero World Tour). On that news piece, there are hundreds of different comments on it. Some in favour of it, believeing that the inclusion of Cobain into Guitar Hero 5 will be benificial to Nirvana in a way to spead the bands music further into people's knowledge. While other people believe it's a disgrace, believing that they should leave Cobain to rest in piece, or thinking this is a way for Courtney Love to earn more money from his name, or explaining that Cobain was against this type of commersialism. Other people were saying that he doesn't deserve to be in it, since that he wasn't the best guitarist.

And yes, that last sentance is true. Though, Cobain was a far superior lyricist. Lithium is a good example of it, in my opinion. So is Come As You Are, and Rape Me... But then again, those are my opinions...

Anywotsits, while people were saying all those things about Cobain's inclusion into Guitar Hero 5, one thing they were pleased about. Matt Bellamy of Muse will be in it, along with the song 'Plug In Baby'. Yeah, it's a good thing, though, I think it would've been better to have all bandmemberes in the game, alongside a song deemed 'harder' in the Guitar Hero ranks. But, that, as they say, is that.

I must dash. Well actually I've got a bit of a beard, but hey ho. Lets go.

- Fin.

PS - Happy 17th birthday to RuhBuhJuh for this Monday. Have a good'un, eh? Hehe.

"I Walked All The Way To Bangor, But She Wasn't There..."

Er.... if you don't get the title, say it out loud... that's all I can say.

It was either that, or 'Needless Ensemenation'. Your choice....

Anyhill. Fiddle me this and riddle me that, I shall carry on like a failed writer, as I am... I mean, too many comma's in one sentance, if you ask me... also I've just notice I don't really know if you spell it 'sentance' or 'sentence'. Help much?...

Tonight's topics... oh yeah, it's the night. Go figure.

First topic. Football. I'm not really a fan of football, but I know a simple rule that is more true than Noah's Arc... Ahem. There's one rule in football. Fuck, any sport. That thing is this = 'long term consistancy equals success'.

What do I mean?

Take Cardiff and Swansea (football, now). Cardiff (I believe, I say again that I'm not an avid fan of football), have had the same manager and (more or less) the same coaching team for ages now, and so far this season they're doing rather good (I believe won every game?). Now, Swansea, under Martinez (name right?...), managed not only to gain promotion to the first league, but to end up at the top half in the first year in league one. Then, once Martinez left, so far this year they've been a bigger flop than a limp pornstar. Why? No long term consistency...

As much as I hate saying it... take Manchester United. Ferguson's been there for a shaite-long time, and where has it taken him? More silverwear than a magpie can handle. And take Scolari's time at Chelsea. Just because he didn't reach the expectations of the Chelsea Board in the first four-or-so months, they sacked him. That's one reason why Chelsea won't be a major hitter in English football long-term. They demand perfect performances in the short term, and if you can't deliver, you'll deliver the shopping for old pensioners until you lose the ability to grow hair. Mouriniho was one of the best modern managers Chelsea had, I can't remember why he left. Though, I would've done anything in my power to keep him there, at least for another five years... that is if I was on the Chelsea board. Ah well, let's hope the new'un'll stay longer than syphalis does...

Oh, just to add that, I should've wrote 'long term consistancy plus an above average intelligence equals success'. I totally forgot about the US's reign of error, Goerge W. Bush... Ah well.

Next topic. Lodern Mife. Yeah, it'sbasically me having another rant on today's 'celebrity age'. Grrrrr...

Anyroad, since I have AOL, everytime it goes onto the AOL Today page, there's the 'hottest searches' section. Which, I saw, was utter bullshite. I was looking at it, in disbelief, wondering 'how is the murder of someone less important than Jordan and Peter's split?'.

Am I the only person that thinks this? Do you stare, shockingly shocked, everytime you read something that basically says 'Michael Jackson's homicide has more importance in the lives of the world's population than the death and tragedy that has struck some third world country that's been stuck by a natural disaster'? Are you? I mean, FUCK. Yeah, Jackson was someone who brought something new to the mainstream music scene, but I wasn't going 'NO WAY!! OMFGZZ BBZ I'Z TWEETIN DIS SO ALL MY THREE FOLLOWERS CAN READ THIS EPICLOLZZ', I was like 'ah well, at least the sun won't fall on the planet soon'. Oh yeah, that last part of the last sentance was from a song called 'Rockin' Rocks' by Powderfinger. Anyways, I'll carry on with my point... in a NEW PARAGRAGH!! =O.

And here it is. This also enters the whole - and before I say this, I apologise for all textspeak that is overstereotyped...though I wouldn't know, being someone who writes essays in texts - 'WEHN I IS OLDER I'M GONNA BE JUST LYK JORDAN BRITTANIE AND JODIE MARSH COZ THEYRE FAMOUS HAHA LOLAGE'.

Err....

It fills me with dread, not sexual pleasure, if I see Jordan (or Katie Price, meh) on her latest ITV2 show. I believe the new one's about her split with Peter Andre. And I feel myself repeat the same word over and over again in my head...

Food?... Oh sorry, wrong word... the real word is, why? Why doed she publicly go out there (I believe that's the main thing about the public...), and allowing everything to be shown to the world? For the sake of money? Fame? Free boobjobs? Man, I thing that Jordan's New Show was more important that Katona being sacked from doing the Iceland ads for drug sniffage. I mean, to me - and I might sound rather old fasioned here, feck it - Katona's piece of news has more importance for a peice in the news than Jordan's new way of earning money by soaking up more camera lenses than someone who bathes in camera lenses. I'd want to know why Katona was sacked, when she was sacked, what will happen to her (like, is she going to go to rehab to get off the stuff, or something else). Not what Jordan's going to wear in all of her episoded.

And again, old fashioned alert here. Ah, bugger yourself if you think this. I might be, though I do play cricket on the 360, so I'm a bit 'post-modern-old-fashioned-dude'). I can't see what good these so called 'celebrities', like Jordan, Jodie Marsh and them 'glamour girls' are actually doing to the world. I'm not saying they aren't, all I'm saying is that I'm seeing them all spread all over the news/tabloids, most of the time barely clothed, just to stay in the minds of people. I mean, some girls are seeing these 'women', and wanting to do the same thing as they are...

Just to pause there, I put women in the quote things because, they aren't real women, aren't they? They aren't they way they were born. They're just what the tabloids want to have women look like. I mean, not being a pervert here, but I can't see a real point to having breast implants, just for the sake of getting attention. Though, I know of some medical cirumstances when it's acceptable. But when it's there to get more cover stories? Piss off with your plastic boobs and your materialistic views of the world. Women with real boobs are much more superior than you. =).

Also, since I'm on the subject (feck, I'm talking about women again...), what's this fantasy with the public and size zero girls? Not saying 'if your size zero, you have an ugly body', but, if you starve yourself just to fit in some clothes that are the smallest size possible? Seriously, have some fucking food. If you have to have your ribcage revealed everytime your in some ravealing clothing. Give up, you'd look twice as better in the natural size for you than you'd be if you starve yourself. Though, some girls are naturally thin, and it suits them. I mean, it'll look really odd if some girls who are usually size six, eight (I'm guessing here) end up as morbidly obiese. Also, if you're like, size eighteen, twenty or above, that doesn't label you as 'big ugly fatty'. Grrrr. Personally I'd prefer a girl with curves than one with no figure at all... bloody hell.

By the by, no I'm not saying that just to get on the good side of the female's thaughts, I'm just saying what I think... and since posting on my blog's the only time I do it, then so be it. Sorry for all you readers (the whole one and a half of you... the half being the moth upon the other readers computer screen as that person reads it).

And as well, (oh feck, he's off on one again)... I hate the fact that programs like PhotoShop, are being used to 'touch up' girls in a way to make them look totally different than they should look like. and yeah, I use PhotoShop, though I've only airbrushed an image once, and that was to see how it worked (all I did was chance the colour of both eyes and air on some random image). Yeah, sometimes it's good to erase some mishaps - maybe some mascarra had run, or the lipstick faded or some other make-up mishap), then yeah, correct it, if that's all you correct. There's some images when the editor erased the fucking belly button of a girl (which was supposed to look like a natural image... hence the fact that the belly button should be there... unless women don't have belly buttons...). I mean, how stupid can you get? Maybe I've still got an old fashioned view on the world. Y'know the one, where what you see is what you get. Where natural is better than fake. That sort of thing.

But, then I think. Why? Again, I think that three letter word. Acually, is why the only word that has no vowels? Anyby, I write all of this, but to no avail. Story of my life, really. I say all thing like 'I hate the modern way of life', 'I'm going to do something worth remembering with my life', or 'right, I'm going to make myself a pizza'. Yet, I do nothing with it. I don't go out in the real world, and work all the way to my goals (oh yeah, I'll just order the pizza from Domino's), I just possess this world of digicality, taking up space of the interweb, just to fill up the time before I go out to see friends and not think to myself 'Jesus, Ga. You're a fucking loner, eh?', and that's the censored version...

Ah well. Feck it all.

Father Ted's awesome, by the ways.

- Fin, and then some.

Fuck.

Well, now. That's a way to entice readers to... er... read...

Or, it's a way to discourage the people who believe swearing is like placing your tounge into Satan's grasp...

But, I assume your the first example, so if you're sitting comfortably... guessing you are now, let me resume.

Again, fuck.

And again, a wonderful way to entice readers...

What has struck in the lifeless world of this humanoid to enrich the merry monitors with four letters of cursage? Has grieve arrived at his door, or has disappointment rained down on his weary head? Or is it happiness that has filled the heart of stone to exhale a four letter word that is related to shagging?

Er... none of them, really. It's some word trickery that I have failed to cast on your humble self... let me explain...

F - Yaba Daba Doo.

If you aren't well educated in the world of cricket, one of England's best players is Andrew Flintoff, which his nickname is Freddie... see the connection?... Freddie? Fred Flintstone?... Yaba daba doo?... forget it.

Anyways, the fifth and final test of the Ashes finished. To my surprise - oh, and by the by, I'm starting from the beginning then to the end - England racked up a rather impressive first innings score of 300-odd, considering they were bowled all out for 102 in the fourth test, shocking. Then, they proceeded to do to Australia what the Aussies done to the English...

Australia, 160, all out.

I looked at that, thinking, 'someone must've missed out a digit before that'... 160! Jeeez... I'm not sure if that's worse than England's 102-odd all out in the fourth test.. Why? Well, England had their problems, like Freddie being out, and Pieterson, though he's going from bad to even badder. Though, I believe the Aussies had their problems, they still had their main batsmen (who are some of the best in the world, may I add). Then, England's second innings was over 300 declared, meaning they were 500 or so runs ahead. I can't remember a time when England had a better time to win the Ashes than this time, but aye, Australia was shy of a win by 197 runs. Gutting for the Aussies. Happy days for England, and Freddie. His last ever Ashes sees a win for England, nice knowing you, dude. =).

Oh, as well, I'm going to get the Ashes Cricket 2009 game soon, because I am a sad child who enjoys cricket and golf games on the XBox 360. =).

U - Unseen Footage.

This, dare I say it, is ironic. I'm probably wrong, in the definition of 'ironic'.

One word of advice, I have to ITV....

Please, stop putting on 'The X Factor' every night, it get's slightly on people's collective tits after the first show. I've had enough of, for one, repeats of the same show, on different channels, even though they've utilised the good old fasion of 'copycat-ism' and got ITV-Player, in which, I believe, holds the show for over a week? So why bloody bother? Then there's Xtra Factor. Again, this is repeated more times than the amount of series of X Factor put together. And this is the TV we're going to get from ITV until Christmas? The same digested drivel followed by the same digested drivel, only with added undigested drivel? Pathetic.

And it's not only the X Factor to blame. But yes, it's ITV.... Stop, please stop. Oh, how I beg of thee to stop showing highlights of a football match that you've shown live coverage of before the news started. I mean, I can't imagine a more idiotic thing in my life, and I've seen screenshots of the new DJ Hero. Why not stick it on one of the other ITV channels. Though ITV1's for the main shows. ITV2's your 'gossip and comedy' zone (which, BBC3's better... well, for the comedy anyways). ITV3's the drama side with ITV4 being added for, I presume, sport. There you go, put it on that fucking side. Oh, and by the ways, I'd be saying this if it was a Chelsea game also, or Arsenal... and definately Manchester United....

Anyways... on to calmer things...

C - 'Oh, The Light Brings The Olive Tree Into Perspective Soooo Dramatically...'

If you haven't guessed what it is yet, it's creativity... I know, I could just say it, but meh, I tried to make you think... guess I failed you...

Anywho....

I've had an urge to start making (or, should I say, 'attempt to make') desktop backgrounds for... well... desktops... er.... Ahem. Yeah, desktop background. I think they've started dubbing it desktopography. Oh yeah, soooo imaginative. I love the way they haven't used all the vowels... sooo post modern...

Anyways, I've tried doing some before, though they were only really for my use. Only because I kept putting CrazyDistortion on my name. I won't stop doing that though. Somewhere, be it small or the main thing in the piece, CrazyDistortion will be present on the work. Call it my calling card, or watermark. I only really started using CrazyDistortion for practicing typography skills (which, even though it's the easiest part of digital imagery skills, is my strongest section), like the thing I made for the bottom of my blog (I think it's still there). Though, I want to start doing ones with people... and that's where I'm stuck...

I figured, that if I was going to do this, it'll be better to use images of bands, famous people, or models that are royalty-free, than to ask people 'can I use this to make a wallpaper'. Because I've recently started to realise how much of a pervert I sound asking it. I mean, I find it easier doing images of girls (please, don't take that in the wrong way...), because... er... I dunno. It just seems more natural. If I do an edit of a male, it don't feel right. Especially if it's me. I've only edited like, three images of me. Ah well. Anyways, on I go with my thing. In a new paragragh... which will start....

Now. So yeah, the problem is, the only one I see possibilities for a desktop background is Hayley Williams from Paramore. Oh, that link on her name is to one of her that I done a while back. It's okay, just not really happy with how the text came out. Thing is, also, I bet if you say 'Paramore' to someone in the emo-scene scene (and no, I don't have a fetish for repetition, nor for repeating things), they'd say 'Hayley Williams' or 'Misery Business'. So, I feel if I do desktops of her, then I'm basically saying Paramore's a one (wo)man band. But, to be fair, the others aren't bad either. The drummer's not bad at doing his banging. Neither are the two guitarists and bassist. Now, it also makes me feel bad that I've mentioned the whole band, and only named the singer. I do (kinda) know the names of the other ones, I'm just unsure who plays what. Though I think Zach plays drums, with his brother playing lead guitar. And someone called Jeremy on bass... that's about it. Anyways. Anyone got any inspiration for different styles for my to try out? Or even different people to edit? Though, one thing I must mention...

I have a problem. Yes, problem is my middle name. So is 'meh'. Anyways. If any of you say 'MEGAN FOX!! OMGODZZZ I WANNA XYLOPHONE HER SOOO BADZZZ MEGALOLZZ', then, a, you need help making your Caps Lock key unsticky (may I add, stop wanking over her. Pervert... =P). And b, er... how do I say this without being bulldozed by a trillion daggers thrown from the readers eyes... er... No offence dudes... but she's kinda overated. And, to me, I don't really see the attractiveness other people can. I mean, yeah, she's pretty and all, but I wouldn't want say 'I'd tap that like a Van Halen solo'. And, I just realised that for the first time in my blog... I talkted about the attractiveness of a girl (well, a woman... y'know what I mean like). Weird...

Well, I think I went a long time on the subject of the letter C... and no, it's not the rhyming slang for James Blunt...

Last but not least...

K - 'Haha. Rofl. Epic Failzzz'.

Again, let me link it up for you...

Text speak > Talking to people > Having fun > Games > Online games > XBox 360.

No? You don't see it either... good.

Anyroad, it's about the joys of the 360. Well, I say joys...

I mean, not only can you create your own avatar on XBox Live (I've been verbally attacked by my sisters... they keep saying that it looks like a girl... I thought it matched my hair better with that hairstyle... ah well, not changing it...), but you can buy things for it with microsoft points?

*Epic jaw drop*

I mean, how many ways does Microsoft have to swindle people out of money? Grrrrrrrr. Ah well...

I do have another question... is it true that Sky (of some sorts) is coming to 360? I know that FaceBook, Twitter and Last.fm might turn up there, but will Sky TV? And if so, would it be for Gold membership users only? If so... I might get gold... YEY. Well, considering Sky TV is like twenty quid a month, and Xbox Live is £34 a year? And the ability to play online games? Result. =).

Oh yeah, have you seen the new PS3 Slim? Er... nice idea, but nah.... I'm okay with my (se)Xbox 360. =).

Well, well, well. And no, I'm not online after falling down a well...

That shall be the end of the post... and the well's also.... for now...

MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

S'laterzzzz.

- Fin.

'Hope This Ain't Classed As Emo'.

I had an odd day yesterday.

It involved a loving twenty-six (ish) hours of awakeness, which started at roughly four, five on the day of the AS level. I managed to beat VeJay Singh in match-play for the first time (his digital skill has a lot to be desired... aspecially because I play on a rather easy dificulty, I suck at many games...). In to time whatsoever it was time for me to hop into my sister's car to go to get the letters. But before that...

Six in the morning. I loaded up the house computer. Waited effing ages for AOL to load up (word of advice... if in doubt, DO NOT FUCKING GET AOL. Man...). Once I did, I went on the Edexcel website. There was (and, I guess, still is) no login section. I spent like, twenty minutes, looking for the poxy thing. Then a brainwave hit me, like, well, a brainwave coming to me. All I had to do was go on the registration page, then change the URL from studentregistration to login. Man, if that's the only thing that I can give to the world... it's that. God help the world.... Well, anyways. I logged in (after having a bugger of a time with the password) and then a lovely screen came up. It had my marks for both coursework and exam paper results for Music Technology.

And, I believe it's a triumph, of sorts.Well, considering that the teacher had no idea what we were supposed to do. But hey. I managed to get a D overall for it. Though, I had a bloody C for my exam, if I had three more marks, I would've had a C overall. A BLOODY C. Ah well, there's next year...

Reached school at nine, with my sister and Ricky in the car. He was stating the obvlious, as always - well, he points at a car, and says 'car' - and then I left them to walk around while I went to get my science results...

Already, people were going YEY or NEY on what they got. The deputy headmaster gave me my results, and low and behold, my prediction of no E's was true...

I had a D overall in Chemistry (despite a massive cock-up involving an unclassified in Chemistry 2). And a C overall in Physics. Once again, the best subject is Physics. If you didn't know, in GCSE year, I only had one A, and that was in Physics. And, saying 'I only had one A', I don't meant that in a 'oh, look at me with my A in Physics', it compares with the majority being C's. So yeah, C-D-D overall, not bad... but by God, it could've been a lot better...

Nothing really happened during the day after that. Managed to infultrate some military bases on Prototype, and if I haven't said it before, get it. =). Anyroad, just vegged out really after that, though I've recently had an urge to get Ashes Cricket 2009 (because I'm too shit to play it in real life). Then, once the night dawned (which, I believe, doesn't make sense), and I went to bed, I couldn't sleep. Why's that? No clue.

But, for some reason, I started to sing a song, in bed. Why? Once more, I have no clue. Though, I never heard the lyrics before... so, I kinda made up a chorus-esque part of a song (which, when I was singing it in my head, sounded rather like Rise Against). And on the same piece of paper, I wrote 'Hope this ain't classed as emo'. and 'Yeah, don't ask' on the top. I would put it here, but since I know it's ten times worse than shaite and I expect everyone will shun me for three eternities and a decade. Then, I couldn't sleep, or I did, but I woke up oddly and I 'looked confused' (see, eye witness there). So I stayed up all night, watching things made by Gordon Ramsey. Lovely.

Nothing else to add... apart from this...



This is a single (not the music video) of Alive by Pearl Jam. One word, my friend, bloody brilliant. Yeah, it's that good, it breaks the one word rule. The first time I heared this, I thought this was one of their newer songs, and I found it weird when I realised this was one of the songs an Ten, an album that is considered one of the best Grunge albums, even beating Nirvana's Nevermind - I personally like Ten more than Nevermind, no idea why... - and yeah, wait until the solo at the end. It scared the shit out of me when I found out he (no idea who done the solo, sorry) done this in one take. No breaks. Bloody hell... But anyways, Eddie Vedder (lead vocals/lyricist) is amazing... if only I could write something that's a tenth of the goodness this song is...

Ah well.

- Fin, but not Finito.

Fuck It, I'm Off To Prague...

No idea where the title came from. I just thaught of it when I was looking at a blog that showed the best designs for a live CD cover, or something like that. Man, if only I can write lyrics... well, if only I could bloody play anything good...

If you didn't know, tomorrow is the joyous day of A level results day. It is also the day the half-lifes get their results (that is, the AS'ers... if only there was an R in there...). Most of the reactions of this pleasant day is this...

'FUCK I ARE NREVEOUS LOL'

Er, lol?

Anyways, once again I face ridicule as failure draws closer than ever before (well, maybe it's because it's only like twelve hours til results day). And once again, there is no nervous nerve in my body. No shaking in my boots - well, maybe it's because I haven't worn shoes for the past week - nothing. I don't want this to be shown as confidence. Fuck, I'm more confident pissing in a public toilet than I am in these results. I just see it as another piece of paper, with whatever mark I've had for the four horsemen of the apocolypce.. sorry, I meant papers (just to recap, I sat Chemistry 2, Music Technology and Physics 1 (resit) and 2). But then again, if I do manage to beat my estimations (which is a low C in Chemistry, a D/E in both Physics papers and an E in Music Tech), I'll be happier than a man who realised what his thingy was for (yes, for pissing).

Anyroad, nothing else to report, really. Still haven't beat [Prototype] yet (I suck, to be fair). I've only had one critique on my designs (merci, RuhBuhJuh). Learned the rhythm guitar to Decode (as I'm expecting people's reaction to be 'sad Twilight lover', I've never read the books, nor watched the movie, I just like the song, ya?) and actually tried to make a slap-bass version of That's What You Get (I've kinda gone Paramore mad in the recent days, I blame the Ignorance video...). Though, I hope that saying I figured out a 80's-esque riff on the guitar. It's a typical riff (like, you're expecting the changes like), and if I figured it out before I submitted my No Angel I'd probably have a different intro. But yeah, Muse has like implanted a supermassive blackhole (yeah... sad child) in my brain and now the only bass songs I want to learn are theirs. Pity that they're too fucking good for me... Man, how I suck. Can only scrape through Hysteria intro. Ah well, that's what YouTube is for...

Oh, and I've got a feeling that I'm not going to do good with my personal statement... or maybe I should take extracts from my blog... what d'you think?

- Fin, m'love.

Critique Fanatique.

I'm a bastard. Yes.

I go on about things. This is also true.

Now, I'll tell you why.

I've had no comments about the designs I done for the clic thing.

So, this is another plea (again) on the images. And this time, no links needed. =).

Anyroad, firstly, this is the begining one, the first of two welcome pages. Only thing is that it's all in english, but meh, here it is...



Yeah, a tad big... onto my second bigg'un.

This is the multi-ligual one, thus, to my pain and misery, it's actually all in english... for now. But it's just to show what it will look like... here it goes...



I've just realised how rubbish the RCT's look, so unsmooth... But, that's not the logo. It's just RCT in Century Gothic font but slightly stuck together. How imaginative. It's the same RCT as the background... wich is loads of RCT's in different sizes and shades of grey.

Well, onto the home page... this is the home page (well, main content page). The english side of it... well, most of the info is on there anyways... =).



Yeah, sorry if the text's a tad blurry...

So yeah, please respond in a comment on here. I wanna know what people who might (though not sure exactly) use it when/if it's started before I send them to the 'clic' people.

Er. Nothing else to say really. The only thing I've done inbetween this post and the last one was watch Blackadder Goes Forth (best final episode ever) and Paramore's new music video. It's not that bad actually (I'm on about the song, the video's a bit quackers). But meh, this ends my image-mad post.

Thanks if you comment... =).

- Fin.

*Loads Shotgun, Seductively*.

I begin this post by making a revolting comment that is... well... a slightly better one than the ones I've done in the past ones. I've had two nose-bleeds in the space of a week. Some main questions is, 'what's the fucking point of having your oxygen transporters expel from your nostrils like Niagra Falls when gravity has gone up by three hundred percent?' and 'how come it always comes when your not expecting it?'.

Well, to be fair, humans aren't libraries, aren't we? Nor are we a personal take-away service. I don't go up to my brain and say 'hello, I'd like to order a nose bleed with a side order of extra blood, and please, hold the snot'. I mean, a nose bleed is one thing, but when you have two in a matter of a week... one during a game of golf (yeah, I got myself a Tiger Woods game for the XBox 360. I am sad) and the recent one (you might've guessed, it was just now...) while watching Blackadder Goes Forth on YouTube. Bastard nose.

Well, it seems that the plague of the school holidays have finally attacked me like Gordon Brown attracts bad karma (yeah, I've realised how creative I am with similies... and the fact that I should stop using them). Hardly slept last night. All I remember is staring up to the sky, thinking to myself 'where the fuck's the ceiling gone?' while singing the guitar riff to In Bloom over and over again. Spent four hours watching the whole of series one and three of Blackadder. That was done at about ten this morning, failed at a round of golf. Failed at LMA Manager '07 (... yeah, I kknow). Though, watching random clips from Outnumbered is funny. C'mon, watching a child asking her parents if she can have a nit as a pet... and the mother trying to talk her daughter out of it... it's funny. Ah well. If I can't sleep tonight, expect another blogpost in the night. Balls.

Golden Balls is on now. Joy. There's nothing like four people sreaming and shouting at eachother, trying to convince eachother they're more trustworthy than the next person...

Also, another shaite plea to ask if you could go onto one of my older posts (I think it was three posts past...) and comment on my RCT designs. They'll probably won't be used. Probably 'won't represent the youth of RCT' or some pompus bullshite that's used these days by people too fucking scared to be different and not use Comic Sans as a title. Yeah, not sure what's wrong with me... I think it's the lack of Guitar Hero...

But yeah, if you fancy it, please visit my other post (which is here), going onto the links on there and telling me what they think of the designs, I'll take your opinions on-board and be grateful. However you spell that word.

Oh, how I despise the tellie in the daytime... I can't wait for the twentieth now. At least then I'll probably see one or two people then... oh, and the joys of seeing how shaite I done in my exams. Oh, happy days.

- Fin.

Oh... Em... Gee....

Yes, it's that time again where I destroy a week with no posts (well, I think it was a week...) to destroy your digital peace. Have fun.

First 'oh em gee' moment. England just managed 102 runs ALL OUT in their first innings of the fourth Ashes test against the Aussies. Jesus. That's worse than... I don't know what's worse, frankly. Er, maybe if it was Kenya or Scotland bowling the English batsmen all out for half a century would be worse... but come on. That's humiliating. Aussies well won that match. England sorely missed Flintoff (which I wish they didn't... can't stand it when teams depends on one or two players...).

But now, it's level pegging (I think?) going into the final match. England definately need Flintoff on the field. And on form. The Aussies just need another draw to take the Ashes back (which, isn't it the ashes of the bails from the first match between England and Australia ever, or just of the Ashes?). My money's on Flintoff out for good now, though England might show more resiliance and not losing by a whole innings... I mean.... the shame of it... But then again, I think it was Anderson (he's a bowler, m'thinks) hasn't been out for a duck (aka no runs scored) in 54 (or so) innings on the trot. Now, considering Harmison (I think it's him) hardly scores any runs, that's very good, ya?

Second 'oh em gee' moment. It just happened. I've got my food. Yeah, I'm eating. It's chicken nuggets... beans... on toast. Yeah, I'm that cool. =). And at the same time, I watched Outnumbered. Ah, how I do find a conversation between father and daughter about why not to shout Muslim at a muslim in an airport is rather funny. Ah, nice.

Third 'oh em gee'. More like 'oh em fuckedy gee'. It's Bebo. It's rather annoying now. I only go on it to bloody decline group invites. I mean, after the seventeenth time I declined the invite to be added to 'Bebos Hottest Userzz 2k9', you'd believe they'd get the bloody point. But oh no. Grrrrrrrrrr. I DAMN INVITES TO HELL. =). Oh, is it just me, or on FaceBook there's always adverts on the side saying 'need a girlfriend?' and all that? Or if you're a lady-girl, does it say 'need a new boyfriend?' or something. It's pissing annoying. Grr.

Fourth 'oh em gee' of recent days. Watching the Foo Fighters on YouTube (because I R Kool, bitch), playing their songs acousticly. Bloody hell. Why can't I write shit like that? C'mon. Take this video...



Yeah, I'm a sad child. But then again, this song's amazing in acoustic form... though with a random scream in the middle. Everlong's also brilliant in acoustic. Why is most rock songs bloody good when you strip the amps, effects, drums, any digital EQ and just have one man and an acoustic guitar (admitidly, there's need of electric amplification, I mean, that place is huge...). It does help that the performer (in this case, Dave Grohl) is putting shitloads of emotion into the song. Man... If only I had half the talent Grohl's got...

Fifth and final 'oh em gee'... I can nearly do the intro to Hysteria by Muse on bass. Not only that, I can do it fingerpicking. FUCK YES. That is an accomplishment, taking into consideration that I could only just do 'The Joker' (the Steve Miller Band) adequetly fingerpicked a couple o' weeks ago. It's fair to say that I'm getting better.... but only just. I've got a whole lot to go if I want to learn YYZ (it's by Rush, fucking awesome bass solos in there). Ah...

Well, that's done for another post.

See you laters, dudes and dudettes... =).

-Fin.

I Are Got Designs.

Today, I have made three designs for the Rhondda Cynon Taf site, which is linked to the Clic fandango.

They aren't complete, they're just a design I thaught about after seeing a site, then thinking, 'Ah, that might be good for the site thing'.

Anyroad, I would like your views on them. If you think their good designs, if their suitable for a website aimed at 11-25 year olds (similar sites areCardiff, Swansea, Newport and Ceredigion).

I've stuck the three designs in my PhotoBucket album made specially for the Clic work. So please, if you have enough time to waste at commenting on three pieces of web design attempts, then please feel free. I don't care if all you've got to say is 'man that is shit', as long as you state why, I'm fine with it.

So yeah, it's a short post, this is the only thing I wanted to ask you, my fellow travellors of the net, if you'd be so bold and to be so kind to critique my work.

T'would be very welcome.

=).

- Fin.