Killing In The Name

I was going to write a blog post about my first few days of my second placement, but I forgot.

I then wanted to write a post about how I wished that life had an RPG aspect to it, so you could measure how good you are at stuff just by looking at your stats, but something else has come up which is, to me at least, more important.

I've been thinking for a while now, and I'm wondering about killing some stuff from my life, either forever or just for the time being.

The first part is the CLICvlog project. I'm in two minds with this, as it feels like there's no point continuing with it. It was only there as a means for me to pass my second year in university. Now, a year later, it just seems kind of pointless to continue. I don't have as much time as I dod to continue with it, and it seems that all it brings now is just shit.

So, for at least the time being, CLICvlogger is no more. And if I can't find any reason to revive it, CLICvlogger is dead.

The other thing, which might not be as immediate as the demise of CLICvlogger, is that I'm considering  either deactivating my social media accounts, or only using them as a means of private communication with people who I usually talk to.

Oh, and on a Wicid point of view, I've decided that I'm no longer an editorial team member. Again, many reasons, none that I'll share here. But on the eve of my fourth anniversary of being involved with Clic, I've sent an email saying I'm no longer going to be part of Wicid's editorial.

There are many reasons why I've been thinking this. Reasons, reasons, reasons. The main one is that I just don't care about it all anymore. Facebook's just a pool of people who just try to convince themselves that they are whatever they delude themselves to be. Most of Twitter just seems filled with attention seekers and men faking kindness just to get attention from women.

But yeah, this is what has been going through my mind these past few weeks. Some thing needs to be changed, whether it's small or large.  I'm not completely sure if these will work, but it doesn't matter, that's life, eh?

- FIN you, I won't do what you tell me.

Tweets From A Twat

Do you ever sit down and wonder why you exist on the internet?

I have. Just now.

Now, before I start, this isn't a call for help. No need to worry or shit like that. Just things are making me think. Like my grammar failing. Nearly said Just thinks our makeing me thing. Today is my fail day, it seems.

I have a multitude of social network accounts, though I only use two regularly: Twitter and Tumblr. I've given my reasons why I hardly use Facebook before, I think.

Anyway, I keep using them, but to what purpose?

Are they my way to vent to the world? To share my life with others who want to know more about me?

Or is it, in all honesty, an egotistical trip down confidence lane.

I don't know, it just made me think. I mean, I just use my accounts on certain websites, there's no motive behind what I do. Well, unless I promote the shit that I do. And no, I don't take photos of my shit and add it to some fecal-loving website.

The only exception to that is my Twitter account, where I actually add my thoughts to the world. But then I think about it, is it worth it?

That question is regarding both the thought I was about to tweet and the use of Twitter itself.

First, the thought of the tweet. Or any form of update, really.

Out of all the tweets/comments/ect that I was about to publish, about 97% of them are sent to limbo with the key combination of cmd + A and backspace. Why did I italicise them? Fuck knows.

A lot of the time, I write something and instantly delete it, before even posting the fucker. Is it because I believe that the update is not of worth? Is it because I think that it would make me look stupid or something? I don't know, my improbable reader. Maybe it's a combination of everything. Maybe it's an option from a selection that's not visible to the human eye. What the fuck am I saying.

But it does pose the question "what the fuck are you doing with your life?" when you have an app on your computer that feeds Twitter and Facebook onto your desktop all the time you're online. I mean, I have TweetDeck up all the time, mostly. That means that I'll possibly get tweets and status updates the moment they are set live. That's a bit... I don't know... odd.

It's, fuck. I really have no idea what I'm writing. I'm just doing the same sodding thing I always to in this situation - write inane bullshit and having trouble keeping my mind on things. Fuck.

Anyway, I'm not that egotistical in thinking that any update I do on the web is worth it. I don't upload a song onto my SoundCloud and instantly think this is going to get me so much pussy or anything like that. More often than not, I just update it to get opinions. I have no intention for things I do to "be good".

But do social networks just feed on our primal instincts? You know, the need to feel connected with others, the need to feel stable within this planet's ecosystem that is socialism.

Or, in my re-visiting into the world of shittery, am I just over thinking things to the maximum? That is probably the thing. Yeah, most definitely the thing.

But that doesn't really answer my first question. The first question where I pondered if my existence on the web was worth it. Well, in many ways, it answers itself. There's no inherit worth of having Facebook other than being part of the times, being like everyone else. You know, using Facebook or Twitter to keep up to date with everyone else.

But then I think, isn't it just destroying the said primal needs for us to stay connected? By pouring your life in a bucket of media?

Then I think, is this was some people thought when the telephone came around? Or even the written word?

Fuck, I need to get out more.

In other news, I hate this gap between Wednesday and Monday. I just need to do something to kill time between then.

Fuck, I hope that I fill out my time until September. With anything. Ah well, there goes my smile.

- He's. A. FIN. -Ily. GUY. Also, feel free to ask me shit on my Tumblr.

Student Moans

What a fucking inventive title.

Yes, hello and all that.

Today started off really good, and after like one in the afternoon it turned to shit. All because of how shit the university's server is.

Actually, before then, I tried to start another of my assignments where I have to design an iPhone app. But the program that I need to use wouldn't work. It seems that I tried to log into Apple's servers incorrectly too many times and they locked my account. Now, eight hours later, I'm still waiting for a password reset email from them. I've already had two, and both were invalid. Great service, there.

Second of all, one of my assignments (which is due on Friday) is that I have to design a fully functional website. This assignment was due before Christmas, but because of some problems with the server and some the other students in the course being lazy arseholes who only want to drink and fuck, the assignment has been extended until this Friday.

Here's the great thing. A month ago, I accessed my work perfectly from home. Now? No. It's like you're trying to finish your assignment? lol jk I'ma fuck with you so you have to waste money to do something the lecturers should've asked for sixteen weeks earlier.

Web Design for Social Media really doesn't want me to pass. The wanker.

In other news, I like waking up early.

In other news, here's a link to this week's CLICvlog.

Short, full of pointlessness and includes a bit of blue. Perfectly describes my face.

- FIN, and a chicken named Gary.