Define It

Do you ever think who and what the fuck am I??

I do.

It mainly occurs when I read other people's biographies on social media sites. I just saw one who described them as loving, caring, intuitive person and the like.

My main thought on that, without sounding like I'm being a total arse, is what makes you think you're the things you think you are?

I mean, I'd like to think I'm somewhat a decent person, someone who has a sense of humour and can be relied on. But it's not really up to me to describe myself. It's up to the people who are (un)fortunate to meet me.

For all I know, people may consider me an absolute twat who's only plus side is the lack of socialising I do. I don't really know what people think of me, but that's their right. And let's be honest here, they are a better judge of me than I am, considering I only see my own perspective while others see everyone else's.

Does that make sense? Does anyone read this blog? Not sure if any of those questions will ever get answered.

But the main one is when it comes to what I do. I've heard/seen people call themselves all sorts, just because either that's the thing they do most or they just can.

I mean, I can call myself a professional photographer, a director, cameraman, editor, translator, designer, compositor and writer. But I don't. Why? Well, just because I do those things (and by directing, I just tell people where to sit/stand so they are in shot and the like, nothing arty or anything like that) doesn't make me them.

You know that saying I live, therefore I am? It's either that or something like that, I don't know.

Back to the point; I'm not completely sure that's true.

Just because you live, doesn't necessarily mean that you're alive. Probably. This is all coming from someone who's only slept outside his home country for eight days, so I'm not the most knowledgable when it comes to life lessons.

Anyway, I think it's true. Just because I played a few games of cricket for Pontypridd, doesn't mean I'm a retired cricket player with a decent bowling average and a terrible batting average. It just makes me someone who used to play cricket.

And yes, for those who think that's a boring sport, I actually like playing cricket. Bowling can be both a stress reliever and a good way to make you think. Don't judge me, ya?

It's just that I see loads of people defining themselves as something just because they have an interest in it, when in all honestly they are either not good at it, or not as serious as they say they are.

That's why I hate it when someone asks me to describe myself to people. Unfortunately, where I work, we get a few young people in for work experience. And I have to say what I do. And I just repeat the same thing - I help out with translation, media and sometimes with moderating written content.

I have a problem defining myself, it seems.

There's only two things that I know I am, and that is a student and a male.

And that's the major one for me. I'm male, and I'm almost twenty one years old, a combination that usually results in someone describing themselves as a man.

But not me. Why? Mainly because I don't think I've done anything worthy of the title.

And no, I don't mean releasing my seed within a woman's baby chamber.

There's so many ways to define what a man is. And I don't think I'm any of it. Yet.

Maybe that'll change in decades to come. Maybe I'll be on my death bed, looking back at my past, and thinking that my younger self was just being an utter arse. So, nothing new there, then.

So, that was a blog post worth forgetting.

- I spent a few minutes trying to think of a way to end this by adding FIN into it, but I couldn't think of anything better than what I've just written. So yeah... FIN.

Fuck.

Well, now. That's a way to entice readers to... er... read...

Or, it's a way to discourage the people who believe swearing is like placing your tounge into Satan's grasp...

But, I assume your the first example, so if you're sitting comfortably... guessing you are now, let me resume.

Again, fuck.

And again, a wonderful way to entice readers...

What has struck in the lifeless world of this humanoid to enrich the merry monitors with four letters of cursage? Has grieve arrived at his door, or has disappointment rained down on his weary head? Or is it happiness that has filled the heart of stone to exhale a four letter word that is related to shagging?

Er... none of them, really. It's some word trickery that I have failed to cast on your humble self... let me explain...

F - Yaba Daba Doo.

If you aren't well educated in the world of cricket, one of England's best players is Andrew Flintoff, which his nickname is Freddie... see the connection?... Freddie? Fred Flintstone?... Yaba daba doo?... forget it.

Anyways, the fifth and final test of the Ashes finished. To my surprise - oh, and by the by, I'm starting from the beginning then to the end - England racked up a rather impressive first innings score of 300-odd, considering they were bowled all out for 102 in the fourth test, shocking. Then, they proceeded to do to Australia what the Aussies done to the English...

Australia, 160, all out.

I looked at that, thinking, 'someone must've missed out a digit before that'... 160! Jeeez... I'm not sure if that's worse than England's 102-odd all out in the fourth test.. Why? Well, England had their problems, like Freddie being out, and Pieterson, though he's going from bad to even badder. Though, I believe the Aussies had their problems, they still had their main batsmen (who are some of the best in the world, may I add). Then, England's second innings was over 300 declared, meaning they were 500 or so runs ahead. I can't remember a time when England had a better time to win the Ashes than this time, but aye, Australia was shy of a win by 197 runs. Gutting for the Aussies. Happy days for England, and Freddie. His last ever Ashes sees a win for England, nice knowing you, dude. =).

Oh, as well, I'm going to get the Ashes Cricket 2009 game soon, because I am a sad child who enjoys cricket and golf games on the XBox 360. =).

U - Unseen Footage.

This, dare I say it, is ironic. I'm probably wrong, in the definition of 'ironic'.

One word of advice, I have to ITV....

Please, stop putting on 'The X Factor' every night, it get's slightly on people's collective tits after the first show. I've had enough of, for one, repeats of the same show, on different channels, even though they've utilised the good old fasion of 'copycat-ism' and got ITV-Player, in which, I believe, holds the show for over a week? So why bloody bother? Then there's Xtra Factor. Again, this is repeated more times than the amount of series of X Factor put together. And this is the TV we're going to get from ITV until Christmas? The same digested drivel followed by the same digested drivel, only with added undigested drivel? Pathetic.

And it's not only the X Factor to blame. But yes, it's ITV.... Stop, please stop. Oh, how I beg of thee to stop showing highlights of a football match that you've shown live coverage of before the news started. I mean, I can't imagine a more idiotic thing in my life, and I've seen screenshots of the new DJ Hero. Why not stick it on one of the other ITV channels. Though ITV1's for the main shows. ITV2's your 'gossip and comedy' zone (which, BBC3's better... well, for the comedy anyways). ITV3's the drama side with ITV4 being added for, I presume, sport. There you go, put it on that fucking side. Oh, and by the ways, I'd be saying this if it was a Chelsea game also, or Arsenal... and definately Manchester United....

Anyways... on to calmer things...

C - 'Oh, The Light Brings The Olive Tree Into Perspective Soooo Dramatically...'

If you haven't guessed what it is yet, it's creativity... I know, I could just say it, but meh, I tried to make you think... guess I failed you...

Anywho....

I've had an urge to start making (or, should I say, 'attempt to make') desktop backgrounds for... well... desktops... er.... Ahem. Yeah, desktop background. I think they've started dubbing it desktopography. Oh yeah, soooo imaginative. I love the way they haven't used all the vowels... sooo post modern...

Anyways, I've tried doing some before, though they were only really for my use. Only because I kept putting CrazyDistortion on my name. I won't stop doing that though. Somewhere, be it small or the main thing in the piece, CrazyDistortion will be present on the work. Call it my calling card, or watermark. I only really started using CrazyDistortion for practicing typography skills (which, even though it's the easiest part of digital imagery skills, is my strongest section), like the thing I made for the bottom of my blog (I think it's still there). Though, I want to start doing ones with people... and that's where I'm stuck...

I figured, that if I was going to do this, it'll be better to use images of bands, famous people, or models that are royalty-free, than to ask people 'can I use this to make a wallpaper'. Because I've recently started to realise how much of a pervert I sound asking it. I mean, I find it easier doing images of girls (please, don't take that in the wrong way...), because... er... I dunno. It just seems more natural. If I do an edit of a male, it don't feel right. Especially if it's me. I've only edited like, three images of me. Ah well. Anyways, on I go with my thing. In a new paragragh... which will start....

Now. So yeah, the problem is, the only one I see possibilities for a desktop background is Hayley Williams from Paramore. Oh, that link on her name is to one of her that I done a while back. It's okay, just not really happy with how the text came out. Thing is, also, I bet if you say 'Paramore' to someone in the emo-scene scene (and no, I don't have a fetish for repetition, nor for repeating things), they'd say 'Hayley Williams' or 'Misery Business'. So, I feel if I do desktops of her, then I'm basically saying Paramore's a one (wo)man band. But, to be fair, the others aren't bad either. The drummer's not bad at doing his banging. Neither are the two guitarists and bassist. Now, it also makes me feel bad that I've mentioned the whole band, and only named the singer. I do (kinda) know the names of the other ones, I'm just unsure who plays what. Though I think Zach plays drums, with his brother playing lead guitar. And someone called Jeremy on bass... that's about it. Anyways. Anyone got any inspiration for different styles for my to try out? Or even different people to edit? Though, one thing I must mention...

I have a problem. Yes, problem is my middle name. So is 'meh'. Anyways. If any of you say 'MEGAN FOX!! OMGODZZZ I WANNA XYLOPHONE HER SOOO BADZZZ MEGALOLZZ', then, a, you need help making your Caps Lock key unsticky (may I add, stop wanking over her. Pervert... =P). And b, er... how do I say this without being bulldozed by a trillion daggers thrown from the readers eyes... er... No offence dudes... but she's kinda overated. And, to me, I don't really see the attractiveness other people can. I mean, yeah, she's pretty and all, but I wouldn't want say 'I'd tap that like a Van Halen solo'. And, I just realised that for the first time in my blog... I talkted about the attractiveness of a girl (well, a woman... y'know what I mean like). Weird...

Well, I think I went a long time on the subject of the letter C... and no, it's not the rhyming slang for James Blunt...

Last but not least...

K - 'Haha. Rofl. Epic Failzzz'.

Again, let me link it up for you...

Text speak > Talking to people > Having fun > Games > Online games > XBox 360.

No? You don't see it either... good.

Anyroad, it's about the joys of the 360. Well, I say joys...

I mean, not only can you create your own avatar on XBox Live (I've been verbally attacked by my sisters... they keep saying that it looks like a girl... I thought it matched my hair better with that hairstyle... ah well, not changing it...), but you can buy things for it with microsoft points?

*Epic jaw drop*

I mean, how many ways does Microsoft have to swindle people out of money? Grrrrrrrr. Ah well...

I do have another question... is it true that Sky (of some sorts) is coming to 360? I know that FaceBook, Twitter and Last.fm might turn up there, but will Sky TV? And if so, would it be for Gold membership users only? If so... I might get gold... YEY. Well, considering Sky TV is like twenty quid a month, and Xbox Live is £34 a year? And the ability to play online games? Result. =).

Oh yeah, have you seen the new PS3 Slim? Er... nice idea, but nah.... I'm okay with my (se)Xbox 360. =).

Well, well, well. And no, I'm not online after falling down a well...

That shall be the end of the post... and the well's also.... for now...

MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

S'laterzzzz.

- Fin.

Tell Me I'm The Only One. Tell Me There's No Other One...

Five days until the death of this school year... Such joys...

Yeah, started a post like that before... ah well. I have a thing for deja-vu things.

Well, I kinda know what university I want to go to now. The Atrium to study either Music Technology or Sound Technology. Or if possible both. 'Cause I want to do both live and studio work with music. So yeah, really doubt I'll get 300 points for it though. That's three B's, or an A, a B and a C (I think?). No way that's gonna happen. The only real chance I have of a B is in Chemistry, and that's if I really study for it. Physics, can't see myself have anything higher than a D, and with Music Tech, I have no idea. I'll be lucky to get a D in that also. So that's roughly 220 points, so where am I gonna find those other eighty points, eh? Lets hope they'd interview me and give me an offer of something like 180 points... yeah, I wish. I have no idea where else I would go if I didn't get into the Atrium, that is in Wales. I really can't be arsed to move out of Wales. Ah well, typical, eh? Can't be arsed to move out of Wales, ca'nt be arsed to go out and meet new people, can't be arsed to talk to some people... ah fuck it.

The cricket season's up and running (well, I think it has been for ages like). The first Ashes test match in Wales ever is just about wrapped up. I guess the Aussies won it in style. Makes me think about getting back into the whole cricket thing, but then again I was useless. And I got jipped for my bowling style. I mean, just because I might look like a morris dancer while I bowl doesn't make me shaite. The fact that I nearly always bowled wides makes me shaite. Get it right, dude. But anyways, expect the Aussies to win the Ashes, at least by two tests.

Well, about the last step to take before the final path of knowledge is about to be taken, or as you might call it 'the final week of year twelve'. Tomorrow, it's Sports Day. Oh lord, such a happy day. I am gonna go, just for the mere fact that I might actually not be the only one there form my year. And well, it's the final one I've ever have to go to (forcefully). Maybe I'll be forced to help someone write the times of runners, or measure how far the javelin was thrown or something or nothing. Tuesday, I guess nothing really is happening, same as Wednesday. Then Thursday, oh my, it's officially been called 'Dydd Hwyl'. Yes, 'Fun Day'. I bet it's going to end up a failure, though since I'll be in the Drama Studio, helping out with the technical side for the bands (see? work experience, butt). There's also going to be a talent contest... which will end up with a singer winning it as with nearly EVERY talent show (and yes, I am counting The X Factor). Grr. There should be a guitarist competing... which hopefully will win. Unless...... er, anyways... Then on Friday, it's just going to be a long service, I guess it's my final one also? Man, it's going to be a boring one, but I'll probably miss them in an odd way.

Er. I have also been crowned 'Most pathetic person' a second time running... I've got Guitar Hero:Aerosmith. Well, it was only like, ten quid. And yeah, it's not as bad as I thought it'll be. Yeah, it's only like fourty songs long, but it's not bad. Walk This Way's really good on Expert. That song's just cool anyways. And to add to that, I have Guitar Hero Smash Hits too. It's gonna take a good price for me to get GH:Metallica though. And then I'd be getting it for the songs that aren't Metalica's. Yeah. Might get GH:Van Halen when it's released also, that's gonna be good. Well good.

And the news just said England managed to get a draw? WHAT? Now, that surprised me. Ah well. so far it's nil-nil in the Ashes series... wonder who'll be the first side to burn the other at the crease....

Yeah, it's finnished. I'm going to avoid Facebook now.

Goodbye, dudes.