Foot In Mouth Disease

Over this bank holiday weekend, I was up in Pembroke Dock (that's in Pembrokeshire, fact fans). Why? Because it was those happy days with the people from Clic and the other sites like theSprout, Swoosh and YoungFlintshire. Well, other people went too, from counties that have no site yet, but since they have no site yet, I cannot link them here. Ah well.

But yeah, young people from all over Wales collected in Pembroke Dock to have a residential. This was my third one. the first one being up North Wales, where some people from Newport decided they didn't like me for some reason. The second was in Cardiff Bay, where I was punished with cups. But this was a weird one.

To be fair, I realised my insanity would take over the moment I got out of my father's car to get on the Clic bus, with one of the people who tormented me with the cups of dread from the Cardiff Bay showing me the fact that she brought a cup to this one. Joy. Not only that, an eleven year old girl (I think that's her age) attacked me as we were waiting to pick some other people up.

Yes. I got attacked by a young girl. With plastic forks. Happy days.

But alas, we arrived safely at the place. Nice place, to be fair.

Nothing really happened in that Friday, other than the dreaded icebreakers. I'll be honest, I don't understand icebreakers. I can't really describe some of the icebreakers, or how it made everyone look like they're attending a mental institute (no offence intended to people who have any sort of experience with mental institutes). On the Saturday, we actually got into the whole 'doing stuff for Clic', which went alright. The music activity didn't go well though, as I took my bass and I had no idea what to do over the chords Paul (a guy from Anglesey) played (damn you, capos...). But alas, I figured out what he was playing and just played the bass notes. That's the joys of the bassist, eh?...

So, why have I named this post Foot In Mouth Disease? Well, basically, y'know that young girl who attacked me on the bus on the way to the place with forks, well on that Saturday she decided to attack me again. This time with her feet.

Well, most of the time she was jumping on me and Elin (the cup tormentor from Cardiff), but other times she was messaging my face with her feet. But I think we got away with a little of that girl's evilness, as she was off attacking Dan most of the time.

But yeah, it was an alright residential, to be fair. Also met someone else who is off to the Atrium too. Woop. But yeah, roll on the next one, eh?

Edit - if you are bored or have a fetish for deja-vu, then feel free to read this article that I've written for Clic about the residential. I've added more to that one, so it'll feel more like semi-deja-vu. Happy days...

So, in other news. It's MkI's birthday on Friday. She'll be twenty-five and she wants to go out for food. So, it's a chance for people to watch us eat, and judge us for what we are eating. Not only that, MkII and MkIII are both being baptised in September. MkII one week, MkIII the next. I'll be honest, it seems to me that they are only getting baptised to please their boyfriends and their families. I, in all honesty and sausages, do not want to go to either of these baptisms. I'd feel like a fake. I'd feel like the whole situation is a fake. I'd feel that my sisters are fake.

But, before I go, I'd like to wish Rhys Bowen Jones a happy birthday, as he has finally turned eighteen, right before Sarah Thomas turns nineteen. So yeah, happy birthday for you two dudes. Don't die too soon, yeah? =].

Whoa, there's a load of links in this post, eh?

- Just one cornetto, give it to FIN.

Every Little Thing Is Gonna Be Alright.

Sorry. I must begin with this...

May I present to you, Alright, by Skindred...



Sorry, I had to. Such an amazing song. It's bands and songs like these that make you want to make a band just to try to create the eargasm such as they created. Either that, or the thought of you not being able to create that double rainbow of a song. Meh...

Anyways, that had to start with that. It's going downhill from here.


If you didn't know, I have three older sisters. This blog is about two thirds of them.

If you didn't know already, Rosie and Lowri (who I shall call MkII and MkIII respectively throughout my blogging life, and just to be fair, MkI is Emily, the oldest sister) are religious.

Yes.

You read that right, reader.

Religious.

I'm not here to belittle any religion, nor am I here to support any. The mere fact of this surprise statement is that I (along with my sister) were brought up in a rather atheist household. We had no God to worship. No religious guidelines to live our lives through. It's only since MkII and MkIII met their now boyfriends (otherwise known as BfII and BfIII) that they have turned to religion. Both have entered into relationships with Christian men.

And, for some reason, it seems to me that they have competitions on how Christian they are...

What do I mean? Well, quoting bible passages is the main one (I'm sorry, but I cannot give any examples), but recently a new competition has arisen...

The competition on who can get most excited about getting themselves baptised.

Yes, they both want to get baptised. It makes no sense to me if I'm completely honest. But I've only now just realised that I have other family members who are Christian, mainly my cousin and her family. so if she (or her family members) read this, please don't take offence (well, this could be a plea to any Christian who reads this, on the off-chance that there is anyone reading this). But needless to say, like my endless stupidity, I shall continue...

As you might have guessed, I do not believe in the same God as any of the main religions. Saying that, I do not consider myself religious. Just because I believe that there could be a God somewhere does not mean that I worship him/her. I'm a science person, someone who can understand scientific discoveries, be that for good or not. Such as the Big Bang. There's a theory (I believe, either it's a theory, actual fact or something I just made up) that the reason for the Big Bang is the pressure (or heat, or something like that) between the dust, small molecules and crap was too much. This resulted in a - you guessed it - a massive bang, renamed the Big Bang 'cause they thought it would sell more books that way.

But, what made that happen, if nothing existed before the Big Bang?

Maybe there was a God, and he/she placed all the resources needed for life and did something to create the Big Bang. Maybe he sacrificed him/herself to create the bang and thus, creating life. Or maybe he/she lit a fart and thus creating the bang.

Well, that is assuming that there is a God.

If there is no God (and a few of my friends would agree that there is no God), then what made the bang? Was it too much pressure? Too much heat? Too many failed attempts at a Rubix cube?...

I've just realised how off the road I've gone. I was going to have a mini-rant (mint, if you will) about how my sisters had Christian contests. And I've ended up talking about God and such. What made me go off the road so far?

Ah well. I'm not sure I want to go to either of my sisters' baptism. It doesn't seem like them. It kind of feels like their only doing it to please their boyfriends and their possible future in-laws. Oh, how my sisters would kill me if they read that.

But to be fair, I don't think that if I had a religious girlfriend (I know, imagine me with a girlfriend... never going to happen...), I don't think I'd have a baptism seven months down the line. Sure, I'd respect her thoughts, feelings and other stuff. But I can see a problem with having a girlfriend who believes in different things to me. There'd be arguments and the like. So, yeah... what am I on about now? God, this is worse than my Twitter account recently...

Ah well, Y'know what they say...

Every little thing is going to be alright...

- Na na na na na na na na, na na na na na na na na BATFIN.

Holiday

Oh. Hi there.

It's been a while since my last post. But then again, I have not had the pleasure of having anything to type about. I still don't. But then again, it's me. So yeah, have fun reading this. =].

It's the holidays now for me. Well, it has been ever since I failed PH5 on the last Tuesday of June. I'll be really surprised if I get a better mark in Physics than I do in Chemistry. But then again, I'll be ecstatic if I actually get anything higher than a C in anything.

Anyways, it's the time of year when people go out to other places in the world because they finished writing on examination papers for now (or forever, depending on what course they're doing in Uni, or if they aren't going to Uni). And, you might have guessed, I'm going to Majorca in three weeks. Ah, I could never lie to you, even though I just tried to. No, I'm going to stay in my house until it's time for me to get my results, and then stay inside again until I either have to go to Uni, or if I manage to do something else. Yes, I am very hardcore.

But as other people spend their money on holidays and memories to remember in their old age, I've bought myself a drum kit. Yeah. Would saying 'beat that' count as a pun? I don't know, but I do know this counts as a pun...




Yeah, that's very funny... very funny...

Anyrimshot, I have bought myself a drum kit. It's an electric drum kit. I also bought myself a double bass pedal to replace the pedal that comes with the drum kit, 'cause I iz brootalz lyk dat, bruv. No, it's because I would like to evolve my usage of double bass drummage to the max. Or, at least to an acceptable level of bangage. You get me?

I shall continue, in a manner that is only topped by my lack of confidence in dance.

So the final of the Wold Cup is upon us, and the bastard Germans aren't in the final. You scored four goals against both England and Argentina, and you couldn't score a goal against a side who has had a player voted 'sexiest man in the World Cup'? Man, that's like Michael Schumacher losing to Katie Price in Formula One. Yes, I'm comparing Spain to Katie Price. Why? Because if they don't get their own way, they're moan about it until they do get their own way. And they're both false. Yeah, don't judge me. At least the Dutch are in the final. Finally, we've got an orange team in the final. Mozeltoff. Ah well, at least Argentina aren't there...

Oh, that reminds me. You know the psychic octopus that has "predicted" that Spain will win... so what he got 80% of the matches right, how many matches has there been? About thirty-odd? Shouldn't there be some sort of experiment that had over a hundred matches or something, and get the octopus to 'predict' who'll win. I bet you it'll be closer to 50-50. I mean, come on. There's a two in one chance that the octopus will be right. It would've been more impressive if the eight legged oracle guessed who'd be in the final before the tournament even began. But come on, if you believe that octopus is actually psychic, you need a psychiatrist...

Oh, and the mindless drivel continues. And if you are one of these people who are religious and can't have an opinion of your own, you should skip this part. It might turn ugly...

In all seriousness now, what is the point in full-blown religion? I mean, look at it. There's been wars over it. Millions have died because of what they believe in and all that, but yet everyone is supposed to be treated as equals. Where's the equality in killing someone that believes something that you don't? My cousin might believe in the tooth fairy, I do not. I'm not going to kill her for it, am I? Well, not today.

I don;t know about you, but I've always thought that every religion came from one single faith. I might get my facts wrong here, so you may correct me at any point, but be big headed in the facts and I'll ignore you. Happy days.

I've always thought, that in the days where Romans made roads and people being nailed to two-by-fours was the national sport, the Jews roamed the land. Then after a while some dude named Jesus Christ entered the scene, had an epiphany (or whatever happens to people wearing sandals all day) and created Christianism (yes, I've actually forgotten the name of their religion...). Then some other people turned up on the scene, and respectively created other religions. But, if this is true, why are there so much arguments and so many people looking down their noses at people who don't believe the same as they do, when they all believe in the same God?...

Just had an odd thought in my head. God is supposed to be this 'perfect entity', isn't he? Someone who can do no wrong? So, why do people fear him? Yes, he made humans (I don't believe this, I'm just using what religion believes to argue my side). And when humans make things, we want to be in command (for instance, in command of robots and digital technology). We have even been command of our own race (ie slavery). So if this is wrong, to be in command, to bully other beings to do our bidding... would God do the same, as he 'made' the human race? Another thing. One of the ten commandments is, I believe, about not idolizing statues of God (correct me if I'm wrong). But, as humans were supposed to be made with God's image or something like that, doesn't that mean any statue that is made is in turn both idolizing the image of the subject of the statue and also God him/herself?

Yeah, I read too deep into things sometimes. And please don't go all Achmed on me. This is what I believe in. You're reading this (well, no-one really is, but if you are...), you can close the browser at anytime... but you made it this far... so yeah...





Whoa, I'll stop now. And to lift your spirits a bit, here's Rufus Hound doing some improvisation on Thank God You're Here... enjoy.



- FIN FIN FIN FIN FIN face FIN FIN FIN FIN face...

Could You Be Loved?

Well hello, dear reader... well, not that dear... I haven't paid you yet.

I'll be honest with you, this is the first blog that I've done (well, currently doing) that is wireless. Yes, I've resorted to use the wireless function on my laptop for no apparent reason other than just to say I can go wireless. Beat that, you Ethernet cable users.

It is also a welcome return to late night blogging (and other people my age would either be being pissed or doing a nine-pinter at this time at night). Well, I say 'welcome', I'm passing the time between starting to feel tired and actually getting into bed. As of now, I am at five percent on the tiredness indicator, though with over half my battery left to go, this should be a short'un. No promises though.

So yeah, I've written two paragraphs, and now I have no idea what to write (well, type) about. Until now.

I've just realized two things. The first thing is that Firefox has a spellchecker and I believe it's set to US English, and not Welsh English.... Damn you, you hound of flames...

Also, I've started to have a sort of a don't speak unless spoken to idea on life. Y'know, it's like, I have nothing interesting to talk about (I mean, look at all the blog posts, nothing interesting... just bizarre...), so why talk? Why burden other people with useless information that is, well, useless? Saying that, it doesn't mean that I won't talk back if you start talking to me, it's just that I'm not the best conversationalist.

And, to be fair, that ideal has gone through to Life 2.0 (or, for the people who didn't get it, online life). It sounds rather pathetic, but I try to keep myself to myself on Facebook and all that. I delete anything on my wall that I don't like, or that says that I've done something. I've gone as far as to delete some groups that I became a fan of because I've saw no point in them. I mean, just because you sing out aloud to songs, doesn't mean joining a group with everyone else that does this makes you superior to everyone who doesn't do it. Or whatever the reason of joining the group is. If it's a way to meet new people, it's not the best way. I've just realized I'm having a rant on something pretty pointless.

Maybe you're wondering why this has made me type a blog up on it, maybe you'd rather have a verbal enema. But by the by, I shall continue.

For some reasons or other, there have been mini arguments - marguments, if you will. I don't know what about, neither do I care. But I tell you one thing, if everyone learned to shut up (or, at least thought about what they said before they said the think), the world would be a better place. Or at least a quieter one. But no, we live in a civilization where free speech entitles people to not think about what they are about to say.

Grrrrrrr.

Sometimes, I think it would've been better if humanity didn't progress so quick. Yeah, I know that it's been millions of years of progress, but it's because of this is where we at today. I mean, this age is the age where there's no real fight for survival, no day-by-day life threatening problems (unless you're one of these people that believe a bad hair day is a reasonable reason for committing suicide... and if you are, you need help). The only thing people (well, the majority of people, as it seems to me) worry about is getting high/pissed and getting laid.

Where as, if we were in the same era as the Stone Agers, there'd be a reason to fight, reason to fear (and if you think balloons and clowns are reasons to fear, it's not the same as having the fear that your family could die from an unknown virus or just killed in their sleep). I honestly have no idea why I'm saying these things. I'd be dead years ago if we lived in that lifestyle (and yet, you wouldn't be reading this), but it's like the further the human race progresses, the need to be aware lessens. If that makes sense.

But then again, if we did live in the Stone age type of life, I wouldn't have known anything about music apart from the fact that hitting things with sticks makes sounds. There wouldn't be no Bob Marley to listen to. And that's unheard of these days. Yes, the title of this blog is a Marley song, one of my favorites from him (the song is about God, I believe, either if you could be loved by the almighty one, though I may be wrong). And, in Redemption Song, 'Emancipate yourself from mental slavery, None but ourselves can free our minds...'. Don't ask me why I quoted Bob Marley. He was amazing. But those lyrics are true. Only we can free our minds from things. I'll be honest when I say I'm not sure what he means by mental slavery, maybe it could be peer-pressure, doubt, or anything that can hold you back or has an ability to create an air of fear and hatred inside of you. Whatever it means, I'm going to try to follow that.

Yeah, just be glad I didn't go the whole hog and quote Three Little Birds...

Also, sorry for the weird path of this blog, but yeah, this is the end. Smilie face.

- So much trouble in the FIN.

But Can You Fake It, For Just One More Show?...

I shall begin with a bang...


BANG.






And yet, more bangage is needed...




So, watch this. I dunno why, I like it.




... Oh, how I wish I could do that...

Anyways, hello to y'all. Yeah, I hate that word too. 'Y'all'. Nearly as much as LOL, stoked and... the most dreaded of all... tummy. Well, any word that ends with '-ummy'. Tummy, mummy, dummy, and so on and so forth, if there's more. I mean, I guess it's okay to say them words to a toddler, but I'd feel a bit nervous if a doctor told me that I had to have loads of stitches in my tummy, and he had consent from my mummy. Man, they're like the worst type of words in the English language. Use stumoch (however you spell it), mother, and whatever the english version of pacifier is. That's all I'm sayin'.

On academic news. I've gone from borderline shit to extremely shit in Chemistry now, and nerly doing the same in Physics. In Music Tech, I've made alright progress on the Blondie song, I'm on the chorus part of all instruments so it's all good so far. Haven't done anything really for the recording task. For the compsition task, I've got a riff (well, chord progression), which sounds rather emo unfortunately. But I'm hoping to punk it up (or at least rock it up, so it matches the acoustic intro) for the choruses (or chorusi) and the other two verses. So yeah, the only course I actually feel like I'm going anywhere in is Music Tech, and I actually rather have the other two being better...

Seriously though, my mathmatical skills have gone down the toilet, but halfway down it had reacted with the water, evaporated, and managed to enter my body through my pitiful need of oxygen to live until the next time I have to go to the toilet. I don't know why. Maybe I'm subconsiously thinking something that's making me become shite, or maybe it's quite simply, that I'm shite at counting. Which is not something I want to admit. Maths has been the only subject that I've been consistantly good at since I was a baby. So, why's it turning on me? Or, should that be why is my brain turning into a mouldy pile of unwanted socks? Yeah, I'll go with that.

Maybe... maybe I'm secretly telling myself, without actually knowing I'm saying it to myself, is 'why bother?'. What's the point in doing these calculations because in a matter of mere dacades, you'd be like the big fish and little fish... in a cardboard box. And I know I've talked about it in a post (if I remember, it was more of an essay...), but for nearly two months now, I've haven't had the subject out of my head. I had like, at least four different moments of mini panic in school.

The most recent one was in Physics. We had Brooks (which, I think, is the best Physics teacher there, but to be fair, it was either her of Humphreys... no competition really). She was on about what monoatomic things where (well, giving a quick explaination on them anyways). And I just thaught, what if we all were electrons, speeding our way around the neuclius in every direction possible? What if we occupy a miniscule section of some alien material? ect... Then I just looked up, and I was slightly breathless. I looked at my hand, but then moved it from my sight, 'cause (somehow) it resembled my mortality'. Random thaughts came to my head. Why are we here? What's the real purpose of life? What songs am I going to play on Guitar Hero when I get home? Nah, I lie about the last one. But still, I'm really scared by this morbid fascination (well, not fascination... but that's the only word I can think of) of death and the afterlife.


Just now, they said on the news that some cook died at the age of sixty-odd. I thaught shit, I'm over a quarter of that age... Michael Jackson wasn't in his sixties when he died/got killed/faked his death (options are depending what you believe, oh and correct me if I'm wrong on his age). And just now, they've got news on the murderer of an eighty-odd year old woman. Murder. How heartless must you be to take another person's life for no reason whatsoever? Even when they've done something major, most of the time it doesn't mean people have the right to wipe their prescence of the face of the earth. But meh, how am I going to stop mass geniside... I dunno. At first I thaught geniside was the murder of genitalia...

So, if you're in school, and you see me looking like I'm thinking about something, there's a good chance I'm thinking about life (or another thing, which I thaught would've gone once this school year started.... more fool me...). Actually that's made me think about something. If you read this, tell me what you think? Either in a comment to this post, or to me in person/MSN/e-mail/smoke signals. I want to know if I'm the only seventeen year old to think this. Most likely I am. But hey, I'd like to see what other people think about what life is, if you think about it often, y'know...

Oh, by the way, I know most people joke about me being emo, with the whole cutting my wrists routine... I just like to point out that I'll never kill myself. And I've never said anything truet than that.

I'm off now... but before I go... a question...

Boris Johnson, true or false?

- Fin.

"One Baby To Another Says, I'm Lucky To Have Met You"

I shall be frank, well to be fair it's better than being Gareth... damn, I despise the name...

To be fair like, I'm starting to take a real disliking to modern life... It's like, nearly everything these days is about looks, or things that's happening this minute or what happened three days ago, because it was so hilarious/shocking/epic. To be fair, who really cares in the long run? Just because you went out on a night on the tiles, doesn't mean it's good to brag at the fact that 'I had three Carlings and was only slightly hammered'. Yeah, like drinking pissloads of toxins makes you a God amongst men all of a sudden. I can't really imagine, milleniums ago, that stone age dudes were bragging about how many times they had sex with their partners, or how many partners they've had. Big fucking deal.

'Ah, your just jealous because you're still a virgin'....

Yeah, and? Sorry, that was a thing someone said to me on the bus. She was in year seven. That's like twelve, thirteen years old. And she's trying to make me feel bad because I haven't bowed down to peer pressure and bonk the nearest harlet who'd give blowjobs for a packet of Wotsits. I know, I'm going to sound pathetic, but I want my first time to be special, well... with someone I actually care about, be that this year or in ten, twenty years time. How would you feel if you popped your cork for the first time, realising three days before that, the person your cork was popped by had some sort of desiese that made you infertile, or worse could kill you, and you only realised that after you had a test before you tried to start a family with someone you love? Yeah, that's a nice thing to say to your future partner. "Sorry love, no kids for us. I let my shaft rule my head and now I have an uncurable desiese that will eventually kill me in these next few months. On the plus side, you'll get most of my life earnings because you have nice tits"... and no, I'm not like that. I don't mind saying it, or being like that. I hate it though when people try to put me down because of it... or because it's for religious reasons...

If you are religious, please understand that this next paragragh or two is only MY OPINION. If you go all 'BLAH BLAH BLAH YOUR WRONG INNEH BECAUSE GOD IS REAL BECAUSE WE WOULDN'T BE HERE IF HE WEREN'T', you just prove how blinkered your vision is. Because there is more prove to it, I believe that the big bang theory happened, though I wonder what made it. Was it some clouds of gas that existed there before the big bang randomly exploded? Did God (or whoever you believe in) set everything ready, and just pressed a 'generate' button on his version of Windows (or Mac, depending on your outlook on life)? Or did some mythical creature randomly light a fart and aimed it at a blank canvas? See, nobody really knows, innit? And talking about God and that, and I admit I will sound like a pathetic child for this, I don't believe in the same God that Christians, or any religion, does. That said, I do actually believe that something is up there. Yes, I may call him/her God, but he is (again with the patheticness) my God. He's (I'll call God a male for the duration now, less typing, though I believe God can be either male or female) not this ideal being that has not sinned, lived or died. He's this real person, not really having a face that I've seen before (let me guess what your thinking "Gareth's a nut, I knew it", I'm not... much of one anyways), that's actually been on earth, actually seen the same views that I can/will see, even inhaled the same air as I will. Someone who actually has made many more mistakes than you and I will ever do. A human that's done all of this, yet with none of this 'saviour' stuff. And someone who doesn't need to be worshipped endless times a year. You might think now, "That's a bit lazy, Ga", well no it's not. Well, I don't believe so. Just because that if I worshipped God (I'm on about all types now) in a different way than what is expected, then I will be shunned for all eternity and a half. Maybe this is my way of worshipping, maybe actually being alive is worship in itself.

And, like many people in the world, I have majorly contradicted myself, and, unlike many people, I shall admit that with all the strenght that I have (though that's not much, so text'll have to do). Because I accept all the stuff scientists said. I admit that the universe is ever expanding, that the mere fact of us being alive is a lottery that we won. Fuck, I'm bloody taking Chemistry and Physics, for crying out loud! Also, if someone comes up to me, talking about religion, and talking about why they believe in their religion, I will happily listen. But the moment you try to force your beliefs onto me, or try to convert me into your way of thinking, then I instantly shut down all emotion and basically ignore you, not taking anything in. I'm more than happy to understand other cultures more, and that has no word of a lie in that last comment.

That's the religion bullshit done with for now, jsut got a couple of things I feel like I've got to say....

First thing is, basically it about food, and the reasons why I don't eat the 'average amount of food for my age'. Basically, I just see it as a resourse. Food is some items that must be comsumed to gain energy, nutrience and any other helpful stuff. Though I don't see the point in eating food for the sake of it. Before, when I was talking to my mother, she said "you're just like my grandfather". Like me with a pastie a day, he used to have the same meal for years on in. "I asked him why, he replied 'I don't live to eat, I eat to live'", or something along those lines. And that's exactly it. I must eat to stay alive. If we didn't have to eat to live, I wouldn't eat. Or eat as little as possible. Again, this might sound pathetic to you. To be fair, if it does, I'm not bothered. It's my way of thinking, at least we have that these days, innit?

Also, I want to apologise. Apologise to basically everyone. I know I can be a prick at times (at times? And the rest...), and I can honestly say that I don't mean to. I guess I'm slightly illiterate in the social scene (I couldn't think of a word other than illiterate there). Also, the fact that, y'know, just go quiet for no reason whatsoever. It pisses me off to. Lastly, I'm sorry for the fact that I may say sorry over and over. I do feel that I have to constantly apollogise for everything I do/say/think/feel. That's it for the apologies things.

That pretty much covers a lot of things that's built up in me for a long time, apart from one major thing. Though I doubt that'll never come to life online, only by word to someone I feel I can trust them. Only thing really to say about it the title. It's the first line to a Nivarna song, called 'Drain You'. It's a brilliant song from a band that achieved so much, even after they disbanded.

Yep, that's it now. I jsut realised the paragraph that I was apologising in reads like a suicide note. Shit. There is no way I am going to commit suicide. Trust me.

That's all folks.

C'ya.